SIDE 1

FRANCOIS THE CHEF

It's my special creation, Mrs. Pinch! Leeks, beets, and celery!

(MR. and MRS. PINCH each taste a spoonful.)

MRS. PINCH

Mmmmm! It's delicious, Francois.

FRANCOIS THE CHEF

Monsieur?

MR. PINCH

Needs more pepper. Back to the kitchen!

(FRANCOIS bursts into tears, skulks away.)

MRS. PINCH

Really, dear? I thought it was quite tasty.

MR. PINCH

Bah!

(RESTAURANT PATRONS begin pointing offstage, as through the restaurant window.)

PATRON #1

Is that...? Is that?


PATRON #2

Yes. Yes. It is. Charles Dickens.

PATRON #3

He's coming this way!

PATRON #4

To the Inn!

(MR. and MRS. PINCH look out the window to see what all the hubbub is about.)

MRS. PINCH

Oh, my stars and garters, it is!